Showing posts with label Family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Family. Show all posts

Monday, October 22, 2007

The Coal House



It is funny how things are connected sometimes. I spent Sunday morning browsing books in Borders with the lovely Pippa and J. I met these folk through attending a Cordell festival and Pippa was the one who introduced me to Kate Rusby aka the girl who couldn't fly, who also sang the song my young man - which is right up there on the list of the saddest songs I have ever heard.

From a lazy morning to an active afternoon where I eventually ended up at Cefn Coed Colliery Museum. I have pictures, but it means getting up for me to add them now - maybe tomorrow and I'll do the links too. Wandering round blogspace this evening, I visited a fave blog of mine - downshifting path- and she has a post up about the coal house, the prog that BBC Wales are running. And incidentally has a little you tube clip of said my young man song, which, also incidently, was the song I sung in the arts festival in Blaenafan in April. So, connections you see?


My dad was born in 1927 and of course I remember his mother, my nanna, telling me stories of the 1926 strike. I remember myself the miners strike in the eighties and the collossal unemployment and depression that followed in its wake when Thatcher closed Britain's industries down. These events are then very real to me because of the stories and mental pictures I have of them.
It is something that gets me sickeningly angry, the way things do when there is no way to rectify them. Britain used to have an industry, now we have industrial heritage. Dont get me wrong, there is nothing romantic about mining, scoliosis, malformed backs and blind pit ponies. My dad preferred the Palestinian War to going back down the pit (which he first went down at the age of fourteen). He hailed his national service call up with great relief and stayed in the army for many years. But the fact remains that Wales and the rest of Industrial Britain was taken for everything it had and then dropped and left for dead when deemed of no further use. Leaving communities staggering or gutted, relying on benefit and loan sharks.
...I wonder if the Beeb will show that?

Sunday, June 24, 2007

Happy Birthday

Lily did her favourite trick again and woke me at three. Lay there for bit listening to the rain on the window, 6 o clock thoughts trotting through my mind when I remembered groggily that this is Rose's birthday. I thought back...

Seven years ago almost to this hour I nudged V awake
I've had enough of this. (counting increasingly annoying contractions and watching my husband sleep unconcernedly through it all) It's time to go.
He replied (and as long as I live I will never let him forget this) Do we have to? It's three o clock in the morning.
Pow! I nudged him good, woke him up properly.
Yes, through gritted teeth, we have to go now. Do you want me to drive there myself?
No, no oblivious to sarcasm I'll be there now.

I remember the air was still and warm as milk as we made our way from hospital parking to the maternity wing. Steam was coming out of a vent somewhere and a blackbird had just started the overture. It was very peaceful.

By half six that morning it was all over. I had gone in expecting a marathon, packed a book, energy drinks, sandwiches for V, tapes, socks, everything. But due to some interesting complications Rose was born by c section, whipped out like fresh tumbled laundry and placed into V's wary clasp almost immediately. And me? I didn't give a damn...hooked up on a morphine drip, everything was fine. I've got a daughter? Great, fab...aren't these sheets a pretty colour?

By evening time I was back in the land of the living, still on morphine but they had evened me out a bit by then, I don't think they liked my singing.

They brought her to me, dark and tiny, like a new kitten. I stared at this astonishing creature that was now my whole world. She yawned and struggled against the swaddling. And I paddled my first hesitant strokes into the sea of motherhood.

Ben Jonson* I think it was that wrote that his son was his finest poem. Oh yes...I know, I know.

Happy Birthday Kitten, I'll never forget the day of your birth, one of the most beautiful of my life.

*Though now I come to think of it it might be John Donne

Saturday, June 23, 2007

The Joys of Parenting

Inspired by Patois and Rose an ocean away but very near in experiences I thought that I would write a little about my joys of being a parent and the fact that my kids have a hero dad.


Today Rose is off to a wedding with her Gran. I refused to attend on the grounds that I would die of cynicism. But Rose loves a chance to dress up and be told how lovely she is (who doesn't?) So, there she is, hair plaited elf style with ribbons, finger nails painted, tiny bit of Mum's lipgloss and there she is, a vision at seven, God help the Neath boys in ten years time.


Well, I'd like to do my dishes
but I can't find the sink

Right, she's done. Time to sort out the kitchen. We had a new sofa and chairs last night, completely out of the blue, so it meant getting rid of our rather grotty suite (yay!) and the even grottier toy chest hulking in the corner (yay!) but the end result is Seven...count them...seven bags of toys and assorted clutter to sort, throw out, find new homes for. And all the while the girls are delving through the mayhem and finding toys that haven't seen the light of day in about a year. Good grief.

In the midst of this Rose shrieks My earrings!

You see, I in a fit of abberation, had promised her new earrings to go with the dress she was wearing to the wedding. This was ages ago. I bought the beads and findings, threw them in my beading box and forgot all about them. Rose however, posesses a fantastic memory. She remembered my promise with an hour to go before she left and hell's own mess everywhere. Oh No! I don't have my crafting head on. Can I blag my way out of it? A promise is a promise...arrrgh... moral difficulty however, was melted in her big sky eyes. Can't resist, out comes the bead box and the quickest pair of earrings and necklet that I have ever made. It's amazing what one can do given the right motivation.

I looked up with my bead blurred vision ( I should wear glasses for close work- getting old see? - but I can never find them) to find that V the magnificent had cleared all the mess on the dining table and had carried out half a ton of rubbish to the car ready for him to take it to the tip, which he later did, came back and took Rose to the wedding before visiting his father in hospital. Wow, I have in fact married an angel.

My children however...

You see, while all this is going on...and I haven't told you about the mechanical Christmas mouse that sings "Let it Snow" on repeat and belting it out mind you, in order to compete with Bryan Adams in the kitchen assuring me that the only thing that looked good on him was me...I wish.. and the fact that I'd also forgotten to feed Zac so he was all over me purring seductively and telling me how wonderful I was. Eden, sensing a weakness took the opportunity to sneak upstairs. Okay, so got the picture? Mayhem, beads, hungry cat, Bryan, mouse, toys from pillar to post, got it? Good...now add MUMMY! from upstairs. Fortunately, I was snowed under with beads and simply could not move or else Lily would be in there like a hawk and these are swarovski crystals darling...expensive stuff, can't go, you see to it. Off V went, not knowing the horror waiting for him. Eden, having failed to negotiate the loo properly had done what she needed to do in the bedroom - in copious amounts. And it was not pretty at all. Not at all...

So there you are not a typical morning thank goodness, but worth remembering. At least I think so. Whether V will ever be able to forget, long though he might wish to, is another thing.

Monday, June 18, 2007

Happy Anniversary

Thirteen years today. Jimany, what a crazy day. Rain, drunks, fights, nervous and rather poor photographers, family politics and you and your best man pogo-ing to Faith No More whilst wearing kilts...kilts I ask you! It cleared the dance floor!

The Jersy Beach Hotel has since burnt down (an insurance job for certain) the Aberafan front has been tidied up out of all recognition. Almost all of our friends at the wedding have since divorced. And we, hanging on by the skin of our teeth sometimes, are never-the-less still here.

We have survived interference from well meaning loved ones, bereavement, a cult, flying accusations, three pregnancies...what a trip they were, and a mad man with a knife. (yes, I know he was second hand but it sounded rather good I thought)

Through it all my dear one you have been (almost) unfailingly gentle, courageous and soft spoken. You are my lodestone, the shoulder I lean on and the wisdom I try and listen to when the anntenae are screwed. Love you babe.

By the way, start saving now good boy, I want to go to Rome for our twentieth.

Sunday, June 17, 2007

Happy Fathers Day

Yes, I know it's a Hallmark holiday, but still time to appreciate Daddys everywhere.


Lily and her Grandfather

My Dad is, of course, a product of his time. Where men worked down the pit and gave the money to Mam at the end of the week. Down the pub on Fridays, Saturdays in the vegetable patch or the pigeon shed and Sundays fighting the wife about going to chapel, going, coming home, eating dinner and then sleeping for the rest of the day to fortify them for the ten hour shifts in the week to come.
Daddy has told me about twice in my life that he loves me ( one of those times was on my wedding day, when he made it clear to me that I did not have to marry the musician/bum that I had chosen but could come back home if I wanted.) But, I've known his love for me like I know the ground is beneath my feet.


Of course the musician/bum grew up and became the finest father I've ever seen. Okay, so he lets them eat nothing but Wotsits and fromage frais all day so that when I come home they are psychotic on cheese flavouring and sugar but hey...
He has a gift for fun, he holds them like they are flowers carved from diamond, he teaches them, he guards their bodies and their spirits. And I know that in the years to come - not so far away really- when each one is carving a swathe through the male population of the town, he will guard their hearts too.

Here's to you Daddys both, with the best of your girl's love.

Saturday, June 09, 2007

The Camel Speaks

Just when you think that you are going to die the slow death of attrition by kids a friend comes along and rescues you.

Yesterday evening after another day of being a bit low, Eden and Lily were finding straws with which to kill the camel, the last one being spreading a litre of bubble bath over my bedroom carpet, very foamy - great fun, and on a different day I would have laughed 'til I dropped but not that day. Then the inevitable happened and the soap got in their eyes.
The poor little blighters were pretty much in agony and there was very little hot water so their rinse was tepid (and rather brisk due to a seriously ticked off Mum) rather than the pleasant soak that they are accustomed to when bathing.

And we went from there. Do you know when you get a bee in your bonnet and finally see the chaos that you are living in? Maybe you don't have chaos, I have it in spades. So I hit it at a run and tidied the hall, which was getting me down and didn't realise it. Anyway, there I was throwing stuff out, muttering and grumbling and the phone went. It was Catherine.
Fancy going out tonight?
Heck yes
Okay ... and off we went, two familys, kids and all, to the Dyffryn Arms for a pint of Guiness, some dark chocolate and the company of friends.

Didn't you know? Camels are particularly fond of all three, straws melt right away.